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Daylight Slaving Time

Topics: Lifestyle & Culture | Add A CommentBy admin | November 5, 2010

Daylight savings time is clearly a tool of those in power to keep the working man enslaved. And even if it isn’t, it’s freakin’ annoying.

I’ve always been a little disappointed by the fact that with all the breakthroughs in quantum physics of the last century, the closest we’ve gotten to exploring time travel remains Daylight Savings Time. To me, the government-mandated arbitrary tinkering with my clocks is nothing more than a petty annoyance; in most cases it just means that all the meetings next week that don’t happen at their scheduled time will just not happen at a different time they weren’t scheduled at. Or that on Monday some really ballsy numb-nut will say the reason they were late was that they managed to make it all the way through Sunday without knowing what time everyone else thought it was. Although there’s a liberal conspiracy theory that the latest change in DST dates was engineered by Texan politicians to give big oil billions in tax breaks, we all know that it was in fact Dick Cheney showing off his god-like authority by bending time itself to his desires. And if you dig deeply enough into the history of Daylight Saving Time, you quickly learn that it was mostly engineered to enslave the working man while giving the wealthy more leisure time. This is especially evident in the fact that TV ratings drop 16% the Monday after the time change (presumably because the working stiffs are too tired and disoriented to know when their shows are on), and that according to the book Spring Forward: The Annual Madness of Daylight Saving Time, the National Golf Foundation estimates an extra month of Daylight Savings Time increases golf industry revenues by $100 million. It should also be suspicious that the Germans were the first to implement it in WWI. My biggest concern is that with the US government extending it a month every ten or twenty years, by 2090 we will be completely out of standard time! On the bright side, at that point I won’t have to rely on this stupid Microsoft page to know what time it is when I’m sitting at the computer,