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Why I’m Proclaiming Myself Emperor Of The Known Universe

Topics: Politics | Add A CommentBy admin | November 19, 2009

DEMOCRACY is just an acronym for Deliberate Entitled Manipulation Of Citizens’ Right to Accurately Counted Yearnings

I’d like to propose a new word and a new acronym for use in politics. The word is “pretesident”. In the states, we’re all familiar with that guy who became president for two consecutive terms by actually losing the elections, and who, once in office, had the nerve to not even be in charge, but instead “played Lamb Chop” to his advisors’ Shari Lewis. What we haven’t heard much about are a few other pretesidents around the world. Recently, one took office in Afghanistan without much uproar, in spite of rather clear evidence that the election was rigged. A little ironic, because he was chosen by our former puppet to uphold democracy and replace the Taliban. In Mexico, we have The Legitimate President of Mexico. He’s not actually the legitimate president of Mexico, he’s just another guy who lost what was probably another rigged election, but has the nerve to run around saying “I’m The Legitimate President of Mexico“. For a little more depth, see this Wall Street Journal piece. And soon, we’ll have the President of the European Union. There have been rumors that it’ll be that Bush administration butt-lick Tony Blair, and those ballsy EuroLeaders not only aren’t letting the people vote on it, they’re not even telling how they make the selection. With all these “pretesidents” running around, I’m surprised ol’ Dick hasn’t claimed the title of Emperor or something. I mean, George Lucas already gave it to him, he might as well take it and run with it. Which brings me at last to the acronym I referred to earlier. It’s D.E.M.O.C.R.A.C.Y., and it stands for “Deliberate Entitled Manipulation Of Citizens’ Right to Accurately Counted Yearnings”.