If you really DO prefer astroturf to grass roots,
you can always buy some on Amazon

If you’re an American who’s angry about joblessness, the cost of living, government spending, and your mortgage payment, I want to ask you to do me a favor. Put down that teacup and that Obama sign with the Hitler moustache drawn on it for a second, and think. When you go to the polls this fall, don’t think about elephants and donkeys, think about power, money, greed, and media. Now that a corporation has the same rights as a person, and a handful of wealthy people who aren’t you control corporations, before you give that person that vote, ask yourself: am I just voting against something again? Because if you are, there’s a pretty good chance you’re being sucker-punched. When less than a hundred people in America make over fifty million dollars, and money wins elections, who do you really think you’re voting for? Ignore for a moment the fact that NPR is a frightening haven for aging hippy liberal academics, and take a look at this interactive graphic that they’ve created that shows the cash flow between allegedly “grass roots” political action groups and GOP or Democrat sources. If you read or listen to the whole article, you’ll find it’s not anti-conservative, it’s anti-public deception. In fact, it compliments conservatives for refining the dirty methods of Democrats. Don’t think partisan when you vote this time, think about whether or not you want a guy that George Bush referred to as Turd Blossom shaping how you think. Because there’s a good chance he is.

As I pondered today’s Supreme Court ruling that in order to invoke your right to remain silent, you have to not remain silent, I was reminded once again that I no longer live in the country that I grew up in, but rather, a vaguely Orwellian version of it. I mean, it doesn’t get more “double speaky” than having to speak to affirm that you’re remaining silent, right? It’s a strange feeling to live in a new country without having gone anywhere. I don’t know if I like it. But it gets me pondering other nations’ governments. I mean, imagine if our leader stepped down gracefully whenever he screwed up. Or if the vocal outbursts typical of the British House of Commons were the norm in congress instead of the appalling exception. We’d probably watch a lot more C-Span. Especially if it meant we’d have some hope of hearing snarks like those of Winston Churchill in the last century like “The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter“. Because you know that’s what most politicians in Washington are really thinking these days.

What’s balding, hideously ugly, and cries like a schoolgirl at the sight of women in pink hats? No, not Sméagol from Lord of the Rings. The correct answer is of course Karl Rove, one of the first people not named Dick to be enough of one to earn his place on Dickipedia. Although while hidden in the fortress of White House security for eight years, he seemed a powerful and confident man eager to endanger America’s own intelligence agents for purely political reasons and hide behind executive privilege when held in contempt by congress, when left to depend on his own manliness, he tends to react like a frightened – if rather ugly – little bunny. As evidence, view the video clip below in which Rove leaps back from the table at a book signing when redheaded, freckle-faced, Midwestern-mom-type Jodie Evans presents him with a set of handcuffs suggesting that she’s going to arrest him for war crimes. In spite of the fact that I am in 100% support of the anti-war efforts of the group Evans co-founded, Code Pink, Evans herself comes across as almost as nutty on the other end of the partisan spectrum. I guess when you’re going after Napoleonic pathological liars whose best friends call you Turd Blossom, more extreme measures are required to achieve your ends. For the record, George Bush isn’t the only person who loves Karl Rove, see iLoveKarlRove.com, a site run by Kat Kinsman until December 2009. Perhaps Kinsman’s love for Rove faded when she found out that he was not only married, but gay.

Rove jumps like a little bunny when confronted by Jodie Evans:

Evans confronts Rove at another book signing:

Don’t be surprised if Rove steals this color scheme for this fall’s GOP campaigns:

Find more horrifying images like the one below at iLoveKarlRove.com

I don’t really swear much, but that was my response when someone told me that Tom DeLay was on “Dancing with the Stars”. I wasn’t surprised that the federally-indicted, lying, self-serving and egotistical asshole would have the nerve to do such a thing – in fact if I were his publicist it’s exactly the sort of audacious thing I’d suggest. What surprises me is that a major media organization like ABC would deliver his image-washing for him, and that the American public would sit there and slurp it up like a bunch of livestock at the trough. Watching the several seconds that I did watch of him wiggling his fat white ass on national television frankly made me “vurp” just a bit. It gave me the same feeling you might get at an old-fashioned ice cream social when the gym teacher that everyone knew had been caught at the local rest stop doing questionable things with a truck driver says “that’s a fine boy you have there” and no-one says anything. On a more fundamental level though, it highlighted why I’m slowly drifting into a more and more apolitical state. It’s nothing new to turn political criminals into celebrities; Oliver North and G. Gordon Liddy were trailblazers in this area. But to me, putting smug-faced contemptuous asses like Karl Rove and Tom DeLay on national TV while they’re under subpoena or indictment perhaps makes a bigger statement about you and me than them, in a way. And with a slew of villains like the last administration  wandering the streets and major television networks, I might as well get used to it. But I will remain utterly perplexed: why the apathy towards these men?

We also have all the money. This map shows aggregate income by county, blue being the highest:

But perhaps most important of all, we’re consistent. The map below shows party swings from 1960-2004. Note that while all the fickle hick flyovers are voting like drunken sorority girls for 44 years, the areas that stay consistently blue are – you guessed it – major metropolitan areas.

Bring it on, ya dumb hillbillies.

It’s too bad George Bush didn’t like reading the newspaper as president. If he had, he might have realized what a horrible person he’d been much sooner, and wouldn’t be apologizing for it now. Not that he didn’t have plenty of help from his Constitution-shredding “co-president” , and the revolting gasbag he affectionately refers to as Turd Blossom. So he’s selling the infamous Rancho De Relaciones Públicas and moving back to his native suburban environment, which apparently makes a few people happy. But where does the end of the eight-year-empire leave us as people and a country? Will we do anything to address the crimes the Bush administration has committed? There are plenty of reasons to impeach Bush and Cheney; are we just going to move along like a big dysfunctional family as if nothing ever happened? Part of me wants to do that, but part of me feels like not addressing what has happened will encourage other megalomaniacs to repeat the pattern. What do you think?

Back in 2001, right after the attacks on the World Trade Center (someone’s going to kill me for that link), a friend of mine and I joked about how Bush would somehow try to link the attacks to Saddam Hussein so he could invade Iraq. At the time, the idea sounded preposterous, and we had a big laugh. That’s why, after joking last year with a friend that “the only way a Republican will be in office in 2009 is if we go to war with Iran”, I’ll go out on a limb and predict an invasion by October. Some headlines this weekend: US prepares military blitz against Iran’s N-sites, Dutch pull spies on Iran attack fears, Israel ready to attack if Iran goes nuclear, US and UK begin war games in Persian Gulf , and the only one in the U.S. media: Iran warns any attack would start ‘world war’. Gentleman, rattle your sabres…