We are 99 percent sure this will happen. Put on your tin foil hat for a moment, and you will be too.
A few days after September 11, 2001, I was sitting talking with my nephew about the recent attacks on the US. Saddam Hussein was already getting lippy, and we joked that the Bush administration would use the Trade Center attacks as a pretext for invading Iraq, which seemed fairly preposterous at the time. We had a little cynical laugh that day, but a little over a year later, we weren’t laughing so much. Since then, I’ve found my tinfoil hat to be quite a stylish addition to my wardrobe. I put it back on recently when the alleged Iranian assassination plot made the news. I was having coffee with a friend, and before hearing any analysis about how looney it all sounded, we pondered what THIS could be the pretext for. Aside from that prepositional ending just now. One of the few figures that said it WASN’T looney was John Bolton, devoted Bush policy wonk and a key figure with the New American Century gang, the think tank that designed the bizarre and aggressive foreign policy implemented under Bush. I didn’t think much more of the fishy assassination plot until a few other things happened, inspiring me to do some superficial research. So make your own little tinfoil hat – it’s easy – and follow me for a moment down Conspiracy Lane. In six months, look back at this and maybe laugh, or maybe go “yeesh, that’s creepy”, but in either case I’ll bet you didn’t know about one of Libya’s greatest resources, which we’ll get to below. But first, a little refresher on recent events. Right around the time this kooky assassination plot was fed to the media, Libya was being torn apart by rebellion, and this of course was a handy way to get rid of another troublesome despot and his Prince-inspired wardrobe. So NATO pops in and does a bunch of the heavy lifting (or dropping, in this case), Gaddafi is hunted down like a dog, and conveniently killed before he can be brought to any kind of real international justice. This all is conveniently great PR too, it makes it look like America is supporting the “Arab Spring”, even though it’s already almost winter here. Almost at the same time, Obama announces the troop drawdown in Iraq, and while people are still jibber-jabbering about THAT, suddenly the IAEA releases the toughest report on Iran to date regarding their nuclear intentions, and Israel and Obama simultaneously start using the familiar “all options on the table” euphemism, which of course means Israel might strike Iran. So what does Libya have to do with Iraq, Iran, Israel, and the US? Well, the typical line of thinking of a paranoid conspiracist is that we’re going to “take Libya’s oil”. But that’s dumb, we’ll get the oil we need no matter what. It’s not like we suck oil out of Iraq and ship it to the US, we get it from a global cartel, and we’ll continue to get as much as we need until we have to fight China for it or something. Besides. Libya has something much more valuable in the middle east. Water. LOTS of water. In fact, more fresh water than the Caspian Sea, according to this source, and Gaddafi already did most of the work of making it accessible. We just have to stoke things up enough in the region by withdrawing from Iraq – which the media is already suggesting will encourage an Iran/Iraq Shiite uprising – let Israel get all testy and do some airstrikes, put some more Al Quaeda flags on government buildings in Libya, and VOILA! We have a full-blown occupation of Libya, a fantastically located place for US bases, with ALL THE WATER we need to whet our little war whistles. But wait, there’s a special bonus! It’s an election year coming up! How often do we elect a new president in the middle of a war that started the same year? To the best of my knowledge, never. Welcome to Occupy Libya. We are the 99 percent sure of this.